More and more couples who are in their 50s and older are getting divorced. Perhaps covid-19 has had a part to play, I’m not sure. I have been seeing many people for Initial Planning Sessions who have been married for 25 years or more and are divorcing.

Oftentimes I hear about a long marriage, but the couple have been living separate lives for a long time. Maybe they have been staying together for the children and are choosing to divorce when the children get older.  Other times the couple have been sleeping in separate rooms for years and one or the other finally wants to make a change.

Division of Property.  Divorces in long term marriages can be straightforward because the couple’s assets and debts are going to be divided 50/50. In such a long term marriage, all of the arguments that one spouse could make about why not to do a 50/50 distribution are usually off the table because of the length of the marriage.

Spousal Support. In a long term marriage with spouses in their 50s or older, if you are a wife who is not working, or who makes a great deal less than your husband, you will likely be entitled to indefinite spousal support. That is because it is unlikely that in your 50s you will be able to reenter the workforce and make a comparable salary to your husband, or that if you are currently working, you will ever catch up to his income. If you are the husband in this scenario, you may be paying spousal support for a long time. When you divorce while you are still working and there is an award of indefinite spousal support, you still can request a modification when you retire.

However, when you retire, the Judge will look at what retirement income you have available to you, and what retirement income your ex wife has available to her. Because of the length of your marriage, the Judge is still likely to make you pay some continuing spousal support after retirement (although not in the same amount as when you were working.)

Remarriage.  It is a good idea to enter into a prenuptial agreement in a remarriage when you have children from your first marriage. Very often, second marriages can end in divorce too. You will have already divided your assets in half. You don’t want to divide them in half again with a second divorce. A prenuptial agreement can protect you from that. You are likely going to want your grown children to inherit assets from you when you die. You will not want those assets going to your second ex spouse. Sometimes these second marriages are tricky when your new spouse does not have the same amount of assets or income available to them as you do. You may be stuck supporting someone who does not have anywhere to go or any money to live on when you divorce. This can cause problems if your second marriage ends in divorce, especially without a prenuptial agreement that specifically states that neither party is entitled to receive spousal support in the event of divorce.

These are some of the main things that stand out in a grey divorce. Grey divorces are becoming more and more common. You may be the person who wants the divorce, or you may not want the divorce. Either way, you still have the opportunity to make a new life for yourself that is full of meaning and joy. Our law firm is committed to helping you find your way to that future.